Monthly Archives: June 2013

A Tribute to My Father.

dad_plane

I have a remarkable father.

When I was 7 years old, my mother left my father, my two older brothers, and me. Before she left, she planned out that each of us kids would be placed in someone else’s care. I was to go live with my mother’s sister. The younger of my two older brothers was to live with my paternal grandparents, and my oldest brother was slotted to go to boarding school. My father thought the suggestion that he was incapable of taking care of his children was insulting and we were not split up. I admire him for that choice more than I can express.

But that isn’t what I want to talk about today.

My father has been extremely generous to me monetarily. Often because I had gotten myself into a financial jam, other times because he believed I was worthy of such generosity.  Some people might say I’ve been spoiled.
I would not deny it.

But my father’s generosity is not what I want to talk about today.

dad_car

My father taught me I could say, “I love you” without hesitation, without expectation, and without fear. Several people have been the benefactor of this gift. I can not imagine loving someone and hesitating for a second in that expression. I thank my father for this gift.

But it’s not what I want to talk about today.

us-little_web

What I want to talk about is this: My father and I have struggled to see eye to eye. Perhaps it’s the gender or age gap. Perhaps it’s that we have different dominate brain sides. Maybe it’s simply the way we each view the world, or a combination of them all. We struggled. At some point, I told my father that I wanted more from him. That I needed something genuine. I don’t think I gave him a road map on how we might achieve this, and I feel certain he had no idea what I wanted. But he got the essence of it.

Honest discussions have sometimes lead to some terrible arguments. But even these have helped us understand each other a little better.

We still have trouble “getting” each other, but here’s the thing that makes him a good man…
He has sincerely, honestly, and earnestly tried.

And you can’t ask a man for more than that.

I love you, Dad.
Happy Father’s Day : )

Love,
P


The Thing About Networking…

20130611-120721.jpg

“Giving connects two people, the giver and the receiver, and this connection gives birth to a new sense of belonging.” ~Deepak Chopra

When you are self employed, the most important thing you must learn to do is to market your service or product. If you study today marketing suggestions, and it is important that you do because your daddy’s marketing strategy isn’t practical these days, you will find the top suggestion to be networking.

For the person who is somewhat shy or introverted, the concept of networking escapes them. It feels like the suggestion is to meet as many people as possible, shake their hand and act like a used car salesman or worse, a politician. As someone who calls herself an out-going introvert, I became exhausted at the thought of attending some networking event where everyone has a desperate scent to them. Yuk.

Know that your talent, product, service, or whatever you have to offer, probably has an a buyer. The trick is to find that buyer. Oddly, your product or service doesn’t have to be glamorous or even particularly above mediocre. For example, in the world of music, there are plenty of mediocre singers, but the difference is that the successful wanted it. Were focused on success. Had follow through on leads and communication. They had drive, ambition, hunger.

But above all. They didn’t give up.

Life is easier for people who are out-going. Why is that?

Maybe because they are more likely to get their needs met.

They likely don’t spend too much time being lonely. They likely have a life partner. And if that relationship fails, they don’t fester over that loss too long before they have found another. That probably translates into a healthy sex life. Out-going people make friends easily. They laugh a lot. They go out and socialize, because it’s fun. They have a network of friends they call when anything needs to get done. If the car needs work, they’ve made friends with a mechanic. If the house needs a new roof, there’s a friend for that. Wondering what hotel to choose when going to the Caribbean? That’s right, one of the people in your network was just there, so they can give you a review of the one where they stayed.

The point of networking is to make friends. To build relationships. To collect the talent and skills of the people you meet so you can become a resource for others. Your friends know your skills and talent and when an opportunity arises, they will think of you. One builds these relationships over time. Over repeated attendance to networking meetings. Over cups of coffee and conversation about the mundane daily goings on.

Networking is just about making friends.

Making friends? That sounds fun. That sounds easy. That sounds comfortable.

That I can do.

And that is what I’m doing here. If you’re reading this, tell me about your skills and talent. Let’s have a conversation. Let’s start the process of becoming friends.

: )

It’s your day. Go get it.

Namaste,

Pamela