My Sweet Old Girl.


I’m feeling sad today. My old dog, Fay, is not eating her food. About two weeks ago, she was in the same predicament. I took her to the vet who found an infected tumor in her mouth. Beyond the infection, it looks cancerous. I’ve seen a cancerous tumor before. So, we got steroids and antibiotics, but I felt these were only a bandage.

I’m at a cross roads. I’ve vowed to never do heroics on her. I expected her to live to be about twelve. If she makes it another three months, she’ll be sixteen. She’ll not have surgery. She’ll not be prolonged again. Now, what I  vacillate over is whether I take her in to be put down or if I ask the vet for pain meds and keep her home. I’m leaning toward the latter. She was so nervous and scared at the vet’s office. I really hate the idea of having to take her there to die. I think it would be better to be at home…Where she has lived since we brought her home at 8 months old from the Humane Society. I just can’t imagine having to bring her home after her death to be buried in the backyard. What a horrible drive home. I can’t bear the thought of having to do that by myself. At times like these I really wish I had a life partner.

This is the hardest part.


About PamelaDevine

Pamela Devine is a singer songwriter, fine artist, and filmmaker. View all posts by PamelaDevine

2 responses to “My Sweet Old Girl.

  • giasuniverse

    I am so sorry! She doesn’t look almost 16! She is so cute. I lost my dear friend Tender a golden retriever last November. She was almost 13 and it was so sad she had many problems in the end vet recommenced to put her to sleep, I couldn’t go. My husband was with her and he said it was peaceful, and the staff there were very sympathetic and accommodating. Thinking of you. Gia x

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