How to proceed when the people closest to you don’t believe you can succeed. 

The old school idea of success boils down to one thing: money. Essentially, it meant if you had more than you needed, you were a success. If you didn’t have enough to pay all your bills on time, you were a failure. Simple as that. Whether you liked your job or not was of no concern. Whether the company you worked for was ethical, didn’t matter. Earning more money than you need was the mark of success. 

That’s the school my dad went to. He doesn’t think pursuing my degree is a good idea. Especially, if I can’t make ends meet. He has recommended I quit school and get a full time job. I earned 9 As and a B last school year. I have a 3.83 GPA. I’ve been invited to be a member of two honor societies. 

He doesn’t believe I will be employable when I graduate. 

It stings when you aren’t supported for the skills you have. As a kid, I couldn’t function without his approval. But somewhere along the line, I learned I will never get it. It will never come, so I may as well do what I need to do. 

We have to dig within to find the focus needed to sustain the productivity for success. It has to come from within. There are a lot of people around you who would prefer things not change. 

Hang on to those who see you clearly and believe in you. They will propel you. 

Namaste, my friends.

Love,

P

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About PamelaDevine

Pamela Devine is a singer songwriter, fine artist, and filmmaker. View all posts by PamelaDevine

2 responses to “

  • frenchc1955

    It is extremely important to hold onto your dreams and your passions, and to find your own way to define success in life.

    • PamelaDevine

      I appreciate your thoughts. I was just thinking about how important it is to ignore the haters. Just as difficult are the those who simply don’t believe in you. It’s so hard when it is your father. I think I’m finally at a place where I understand his idea of success and mine simply don’t agree. It doesn’t make him wrong, it just means he can not see the value of encouraging me.

      Funny thing is, I remember my father defying his parents. He flew a small plane and had since his late teens. His father hated it. He would send him newspaper clippings of airplane crashes. Finally, his father sat him down and said he was welcome to come visit, but not if he flew there. My dad told me of the conversation. The next time we planned a trip to see my grandparents dad decided we would fly. I reminded him of grandpa’s condition. He ignored it. I was shocked he would defy his father, but flying was my father’s passion.

      I have a 3.83 GPA. I’m on the dean’s list. I’ve been invited to join two honor societies. There is no greater evidence of college success than these. In addition, even with the difficulty recent college graduates have had in garnering employment, no one will depute that acquiring a college degree is the most widely accepted precursor to gainful employment.

      I will have my age against me when I graduate. This will be a consideration in acquiring a job, but also in paying back my student loans. It is a risk, without a doubt. But I’m confident that my work will speak on my behalf.

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